How to Overcome Fearing You Haven’t Achieved Much in Life Yet

Man-looking-into-beyond

Interestingly, this feeling can strike at any age. I remember feeling “old” when I turned 16 and then again at 25!

My friends and I jokingly referred to this feeling of dread and fear in our mid-20s as a “pre-mid-life crisis” crisis.

I think when you get to a certain point in your adult life it becomes natural to think of things like What your life has meant, What you’ve achieved and done so far, and also What’s next?

Person looking into the Beyond

Sometimes, getting older can also bring feelings…of fear.

Have you felt that in your life? Don’t worry, that’s ok…

Your fear is not unfounded. It can be a scary thing to contemplate the unknown.

For me, what has helped me to deal with, live with, manage and overcome feelings of fear is one word, which I believe is a very powerful word…

“Acceptance”.

We are built to feel fear

As human beings, we’re built to feel fear. In many cases it’s actually a very useful thing, it makes us err on the side of caution, it helps us judge a situation where there may be danger, it can even excite us and be fun (like a roller coaster ride at a funfair).

However, where it becomes unhealthy is when that feeling of fear follows us and lives with us constantly in our minds and hearts.

When that happens it’s not helping anymore it’s hindering us from living a full, complete and joyful life.

4 Steps to Overcoming the Fear

  • Start with Acceptance. There has to be a genuine acceptance of where you are in your life right now. Do it gently, and gradually – however you do it will be up to you – but that “positive acceptance” has to happen first. Only after you’ve done that, can you move on to the next steps.
  • Gratitude – If you’ve managed to accept your current situation, you can now shift the focus towards looking for things to be grateful for. There are plenty. Don’t dwell on fear, regret or loss, instead – celebrate ABUNDANCE by focusing on the things that bring you happiness right now. Could be anything from having a roof over your head to enjoying a cup of your favourite drink at the moment : )
  • Find a sense of “Purpose” – think of a project you can devote yourself to. A cause, a movement a charity, a small business. Or…maybe you can (finally) get moving in your spare time on something you’ve put off for a long time. Loved creative writing? Get that first paragraph written. Loved drawing? Buy a sketchpad and start doodling.

A sense of purpose will give you something positive to focus on, look forward to and keep you focused on the future in a new, fresh and exciting way.

Purpose
  • And last but not least…is the step that binds all the above together. It’s this: Be Present in the Now. Live in the Now.

The best way to live a happy existence is to adopt a state of mind, where you are present when it matters most: Right Now.

Enjoy the journey!

Mark

Mark Villarosa - Digital Entrepreneur

My name is Mark Villarosa. I’m a music artist & online entrepreneur.

I’m on a mission to inspire people to follow their passion by starting a business around what they love.

How to Use Your Dreams to Lead You to Your True Purpose in Life

Can I ask you something?

What gets you up out of bed, on a chilly Monday morning, it’s still dark outside when the alarm starts beeping at you, and all you want to do is switch it off, curl up and sleep some more.

If you’re like most people the answer to that question, is probably a job.

It gets you up because you have to get up. Having a job is a good thing right? It provides you with an income to pay the bills, go on holidays, go out shopping, and have a sit-down dinner at a nice restaurant to treat yourself to. Those are all good things and I’m not knocking any of them.

But when I cast my mind back to when I was young. I don’t remember dreaming of waking up early in the morning to go to an office, working at a desk for hours on end, hardly seeing daylight, and then going home in rush hour traffic – to do the same thing all over again the next day.

I don’t remember that being my dream.

My dreams were of me, playing music, there were smiling faces of the people I would play and sing to, and I made lots of people happy.

Me aged 5 playing my Dads keyboard

I dreamed of adventure.

Travelling to strange and wondrous places and making many new friends along the way in amazing new lands.

Those were the dreams I had.

I think as we grew older, many of us were taught to suppress our natural inclinations to believe we could be whatever we wanted to be by well-meaning loved ones who wanted the best for us; but in wishing to protect us from falling and hurting ourselves, clipped our wings, and grounded us.

What were your dreams? What or Who did you want to become? Do you still think about it from time to time? Or maybe a lot?

I believe the dreams we have, especially when we were young, are the purest essence of who we really are, and are meant to be while on this earth.

The reality of it is, that many of us have responsibilities (rent, mortgages, families) that require us to stay committed to our jobs. But there are ways that you can still connect with those dreams and to the person, your young self believed you could be.

I’m a big fan of lists! I challenge you to write one for yourself, a list of ways to stay close to your dreams and to get closer to living a life aligned with your dreams.

Here’s one I made, as an idea starter for you.

  1. Take a home study course on the particular thing you dream of doing or becoming
  2. Research online forums where people are discussing what you’re passionate about and JOIN IN the discussion
  3. See if there are any local clubs or communities where people are also into what you love, and be a part of that community
  4. Volunteer for charities that are involved in helping young people achieve those dreams
  5. Find a mentor to emulate or use as inspiration; Someone who managed to achieve the things you dreamed of
  6. Partner up with an “accountability buddy” – ask a good friend to keep you accountable for things you say you’ll do to get closer to your dream. Set dates of things you intend to do, and ask your friend to check if you get them done

What else would you add to the list?

My message to you is: Don’t. Give. Up. On. Your. Dreams.

Stay close to them in any way you can.

I’m a great believer that dreams are a “language” your soul uses to communicate your deepest and highest purpose in life.

And if you find, that you have dreams that won’t seem to go away? But keep coming back to nudge you every so often? Then maybe that’s your soul trying to tell you something.

Maybe it’s trying to remind you, who you really are.

Mark Villarosa - Digital Entrepreneur

My name’s Mark.

I’m on a mission to inspire and help people find their purpose, start their own business, follow their passion and do what they love.

Just enter your details and I’ll email you my free 3-step guide to help you find your purpose and build your dream business.

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